↓ Transcript
Panel 1:
Jefferson: "James Garfield, is that your phone ringing?"
Garfield: "Ugh. This same number all week. It just comes up 'Guiteau.'"

Panel 2:
James Garfield takes out his mobile version of the first commercial telephone from 1877. It’s a wooden box with a cylinder shaped receiver.
Garfield: “Hello?”
On phone: “I hereby make a formal application for the Austrian Mission. I feel I have a right to do it on account of my services during the canvas. I ask this as a personal tribute.”
Garfield: “Do not Call!”

Panel 3:
Garfield: "I swear, these scam callers will be the death of me."